Blogdotes

-You IDIOT! BASTARD! MOTHER@$#%@^%$@! We just rode over the cat!
-Ooops….Sorry darling. I’m guilty as hell…I’ll try to do better next time…Please can I drive?

A guy comes to visit his friend which he hasn’t seen in years. Friend’s little son opens the door.
“Hi. Could you get your dad?”
“No. He was hit by monster truck.”
“Oh! How unfortunate. Could I talk to your mum?”
“No. She was hit by the monster truck!”
“I’m so sorry… Could I then talk to your granddad?”
“No. Hit by the monster truck too..”
“Grandma?”
“Too…”
“What a tragedy. And what are you doing here, alone?”
“Playing with my monster truck. Wanna join….?”

Ten things men know about women:

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10. They have tits…

Father rabbit teaches his son to breed:
”Look, son, we are small animals and there are a lot dangers around. So when you do it, you have to do it quick. See, here. I’ve got these four lady rabbits lined up. You go and do it fast. OneTwoThreeFour. See?”
“Yes, look dad. One…two…three…four”
“No, no, no! OneTwoThreeFour! Got it?”
“One..two..three..four”
“NO! OneTwoThreeFour!”
“One,two,three,four”
“That’s better. But still too slow. You have to do it like this – OneTwoThreeFour!”
“OneTwoThreeFourFive….Ooops, sorry dad!”

A company of friends are having a party. But one of them seems not to have a good time. His friends ask what is a problem.
“My wife just tested positive with HIV.”
“C’ mon, guys it was a joke. Why did you all turned so pale all of a sudden?”