March 11th, 2006
Driving directions from a wife
-You IDIOT! BASTARD! MOTHER@$#%@^%$@! We just rode over the cat!
-Ooops….Sorry darling. I’m guilty as hell…I’ll try to do better next time…Please can I drive?
February 17th, 2006
Joke: Geek reproduction
“Father, how did I come into being”, asks son.
“Well, son, that’s a tricky question…But I guess you will find out sooner or later. So let’s get over with it now… I first talked to your mum in the Chat Room. Then we met in the Internet Café. There we went to Back Office where your mother wanted to Install some Software from my Joystick. But when we started the Installation process, we suddenly noticed that our Firewall was down and it was too late to press Cancel or ESC, because we have disabled the option “Do you want to cancel the installation process” in Admin Panel. Your mum’s Antivirus Software hasn’t been updated in weeks and missed the Blaster worm. Well, the SIP (Software Installation Process) went into the self Reinforcing Loop for the next nine months, when it finally produced some unexpected results…”
February 14th, 2006
Joke: Monster truck
A guy comes to visit his friend which he hasn’t seen in years. Friend’s little son opens the door.
“Hi. Could you get your dad?”
“No. He was hit by monster truck.”
“Oh! How unfortunate. Could I talk to your mum?”
“No. She was hit by the monster truck!”
“I’m so sorry… Could I then talk to your granddad?”
“No. Hit by the monster truck too..”
“Grandma?”
“Too…”
“What a tragedy. And what are you doing here, alone?”
“Playing with my monster truck. Wanna join….?”
February 13th, 2006
Joke: Men and women
Ten things men know about women:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10. They have tits…
February 12th, 2006
Joke: Breeding Rabbits
Father rabbit teaches his son to breed:
”Look, son, we are small animals and there are a lot dangers around. So when you do it, you have to do it quick. See, here. I’ve got these four lady rabbits lined up. You go and do it fast. OneTwoThreeFour. See?”
“Yes, look dad. One…two…three…four”
“No, no, no! OneTwoThreeFour! Got it?”
“One..two..three..four”
“NO! OneTwoThreeFour!”
“One,two,three,four”
“That’s better. But still too slow. You have to do it like this – OneTwoThreeFour!”
“OneTwoThreeFourFive….Ooops, sorry dad!”